Our Christmas Card Photo:
Perfectly Content with a Hula Hoop and a Tea Set from Santa:
Our Little Elf Sadie Looking Quite Grown Up:
Super Cheesy Mama & Sadie Smushed Faces Happy Picture:
Friday, December 25, 2009
Merry Christmas, everyone!
Our Little Elf Sadie Looking Quite Grown Up:
Super Cheesy Mama & Sadie Smushed Faces Happy Picture:
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Light a candle.
On December 19, 2007, Jennifer and Graham Gibbs Bankston tragically passed away.
Jenny suffered silently with postpartum depression but her symptoms could have been detected and treated. Jenny's Light was created by her family to be a source of information, hope and inspiration. We strive to stop this type of tragedy from happening to others. The mission of Jenny's Light is to improve and save lives by increasing awareness of all perinatal mood disorders including postpartum depression.
Light a candle.
Hug your loved ones.
Call a friend you're thinking about.
If you know any new mothers, ask them how they are doing.
Really ask. And then listen.
Offer and give a little support if you can. Perhaps you can spare an hour to sit with the baby so that mom can take a shower or a nap. Bring a meal? Do an errand for her? Even a small gesture could make a huge difference.
Especially this time of year.
Rest in peace, Jenny and Graham. You're in my thoughts.
Hug your loved ones.
Call a friend you're thinking about.
If you know any new mothers, ask them how they are doing.
Really ask. And then listen.
Offer and give a little support if you can. Perhaps you can spare an hour to sit with the baby so that mom can take a shower or a nap. Bring a meal? Do an errand for her? Even a small gesture could make a huge difference.
Especially this time of year.
Rest in peace, Jenny and Graham. You're in my thoughts.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Catch Up
Okay, now that little Ruby is home-sweet-home in Montana, I can refocus. (I was *really* preoccupied with that little one's situation!)
Thanksgiving in MA was wonderful. I am one of those rare, lucky individuals whose got mutual adoration with the in-laws going on. Seriously. Lucky. We stayed for 8 nights and really enjoyed ourselves the whole time.
Nana had art projects for Sadie:
Uncle Justin and Daddy got to reminisce with 30+ year old toys (Legos, Matchbox cars and marbles):
Sadie fell in love with a bunch of her second cousins:
We even got to see some sheep at Nana and Papa's friends' house:
We returned on December 1st and had to kick it into high gear for Christmas prep. We have a cute little tree which Sadie adores:
We've introduced the whole "Santa" thing as well as the concept of Baby Jesus. Funny story - my mom was with me when I had a chance to talk to Sadie about Christmas being Baby Jesus' birthday. I said something like "his mama is Mary, and she had a little boy." Sadie just looked at me and then cocked her head to the side and said, "No, mama. Mary had a little lamb."
She's loving the lights, decorations, trees, music, etc. this year. It's fun to watch. This will be a memorable holiday for us with her.
Thanksgiving in MA was wonderful. I am one of those rare, lucky individuals whose got mutual adoration with the in-laws going on. Seriously. Lucky. We stayed for 8 nights and really enjoyed ourselves the whole time.
Nana had art projects for Sadie:
Uncle Justin and Daddy got to reminisce with 30+ year old toys (Legos, Matchbox cars and marbles):
Sadie fell in love with a bunch of her second cousins:
We even got to see some sheep at Nana and Papa's friends' house:
We returned on December 1st and had to kick it into high gear for Christmas prep. We have a cute little tree which Sadie adores:
We've introduced the whole "Santa" thing as well as the concept of Baby Jesus. Funny story - my mom was with me when I had a chance to talk to Sadie about Christmas being Baby Jesus' birthday. I said something like "his mama is Mary, and she had a little boy." Sadie just looked at me and then cocked her head to the side and said, "No, mama. Mary had a little lamb."
She's loving the lights, decorations, trees, music, etc. this year. It's fun to watch. This will be a memorable holiday for us with her.
Thursday, December 10, 2009
distracted
I sat down to update my blog (I've neglected it so!) this morning but got sidetracked catching up on a few of my favorite blogs that I read.
Turns out one of the gals in Montana that I follow has been going through hell with her new baby. I'm feeling for her and her family big time.
So, I'll have to attempt an update later.
Turns out one of the gals in Montana that I follow has been going through hell with her new baby. I'm feeling for her and her family big time.
So, I'll have to attempt an update later.
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
snuggle-icious
A request I've been getting from Sadie a lot lately is, "Can we have a little snuggle?"
Music to my ears.
I try to drop anything I'm doing and indulge her (and myself), because I know this time is fleeting. Sometimes it's just a few seconds, but other times, like this morning - it was the better part of half an hour that she just wanted to be held on the couch, wrapped in her "cozy" blanket, with a few of her stuffed animal friends. Heaven. She didn't talk much, but she let out several deep sighs and she looked straight into my eyes and grinned a bunch of times too. I smoothed her hair and kissed her head over and over and over. I was so glad that we didn't need to be anywhere.
I don't know why she needed such an extended snuggle today, but I was more than happy to partake. I hope with all of my might that moments like those get cemented somewhere deep within her little psyche so that she will always, always know how loved and cherished she is. I feel confident that I'll never forget how this love feels, but what if she does?
This brings me to my musings about how little time we have together - just the two of us & Daddy - before Bun arrives in the Spring. I know there is plenty of potential to over-think and over-analyze the situation. I also know there are numerous books on the topic of how to handle the introduction of a new sibling to a toddler. I haven't gone there yet. I'm just trying to hold onto the way things are, while consistently reminding her about the baby in a positive, excited way. So far, she seems genuinely happy about becoming a big sister. She says matter-of-factly, "it's a girl baby, Mama" no matter how many times I tell her "well, it could be a boy baby in there. We don't know yet - it will be a surprise for us." She usually continues by saying "I will hold her in my lap, and look at her." Really cute. Lately she's been seeing things in stores and saying "oh! the baby will like this! Shall we get it for a present for her?" It all seems a little too good to be true. I'll take it for now, but as Andrew says, "It's really sweet, but let's hope she still feels that way when she has to deal with a new baby 24/7."
One of my best friends, M, admitted to me once that she cried earnestly the night before her second son was born because she was overcome with emotion about how this was going to change her relationship forever between her and her first son. Admittedly, M is one of my "mom guru" friends whose every word about motherhood is like gold to me, but I remember thinking how interesting this particular admission was and how undoubtedly true it must be for many moms. And yet I don't think I'd ever heard anyone say it before.
Until today.
I came across an article in my online subscription to Mothering magazine entitled "And Baby Makes Four". I thought I'd mostly heard it all, and it basically always boiled down to one point: you don't know how you're going to love another child as much as #1, but somehow in that magical mother way, you just do.
While I believe that, I also know that the adjustment is real, and it is a big change for all involved, no matter how you slice it. Here's one nugget that I'd like to share from the article, written by Natalia Swenson Parker of Ellensburg, WA.
It may sound ludicrous to many that the mother of a newborn baby might need to grieve anything, but if you ask me, it's just one more real example of how complex of a life change motherhood is, and how important it is to allow new moms to have their feelings - whatever they may be - instead of expecting them to be full of nothing but ethereal, unwavering bliss.
For now, I am going to focus on savoring my one-on-one time with Sadie. Soaking up this snuggling phase she's into right now is just about perfect.
I try to drop anything I'm doing and indulge her (and myself), because I know this time is fleeting. Sometimes it's just a few seconds, but other times, like this morning - it was the better part of half an hour that she just wanted to be held on the couch, wrapped in her "cozy" blanket, with a few of her stuffed animal friends. Heaven. She didn't talk much, but she let out several deep sighs and she looked straight into my eyes and grinned a bunch of times too. I smoothed her hair and kissed her head over and over and over. I was so glad that we didn't need to be anywhere.
I don't know why she needed such an extended snuggle today, but I was more than happy to partake. I hope with all of my might that moments like those get cemented somewhere deep within her little psyche so that she will always, always know how loved and cherished she is. I feel confident that I'll never forget how this love feels, but what if she does?
This brings me to my musings about how little time we have together - just the two of us & Daddy - before Bun arrives in the Spring. I know there is plenty of potential to over-think and over-analyze the situation. I also know there are numerous books on the topic of how to handle the introduction of a new sibling to a toddler. I haven't gone there yet. I'm just trying to hold onto the way things are, while consistently reminding her about the baby in a positive, excited way. So far, she seems genuinely happy about becoming a big sister. She says matter-of-factly, "it's a girl baby, Mama" no matter how many times I tell her "well, it could be a boy baby in there. We don't know yet - it will be a surprise for us." She usually continues by saying "I will hold her in my lap, and look at her." Really cute. Lately she's been seeing things in stores and saying "oh! the baby will like this! Shall we get it for a present for her?" It all seems a little too good to be true. I'll take it for now, but as Andrew says, "It's really sweet, but let's hope she still feels that way when she has to deal with a new baby 24/7."
One of my best friends, M, admitted to me once that she cried earnestly the night before her second son was born because she was overcome with emotion about how this was going to change her relationship forever between her and her first son. Admittedly, M is one of my "mom guru" friends whose every word about motherhood is like gold to me, but I remember thinking how interesting this particular admission was and how undoubtedly true it must be for many moms. And yet I don't think I'd ever heard anyone say it before.
Until today.
I came across an article in my online subscription to Mothering magazine entitled "And Baby Makes Four". I thought I'd mostly heard it all, and it basically always boiled down to one point: you don't know how you're going to love another child as much as #1, but somehow in that magical mother way, you just do.
While I believe that, I also know that the adjustment is real, and it is a big change for all involved, no matter how you slice it. Here's one nugget that I'd like to share from the article, written by Natalia Swenson Parker of Ellensburg, WA.
- I don't think there's enough good literature that effectively addresses how difficult it is to lose the dyadic relationship between a mother and her firstborn. It's painful-for both of you-to lose the exclusivity that, up until now, has been a hallmark of your entire time together. Feeling sad about this loss is normal, and doesn't mean that you love your second child any less than you love your first. Grief over the loss of the past is to be expected and permitted at such a time of major adjustment.
It may sound ludicrous to many that the mother of a newborn baby might need to grieve anything, but if you ask me, it's just one more real example of how complex of a life change motherhood is, and how important it is to allow new moms to have their feelings - whatever they may be - instead of expecting them to be full of nothing but ethereal, unwavering bliss.
For now, I am going to focus on savoring my one-on-one time with Sadie. Soaking up this snuggling phase she's into right now is just about perfect.
Sunday, November 15, 2009
The end of an era...
Tonight I sent an email to my 3 siblings that has left me a little sad. I made something official that-although we are all in agreement on-feels like a surrender of sorts.
We will not be throwing our annual Saunders Christmas Party this year.
We've been co-hosting this event with the support and generous hospitality of our parents for 15 years. Well, this would have been the 15th year, anyway.
There are a handful of reasons why it doesn't make sense for us to have it anymore - one of them being the fact that Joanne will still be in New Zealand next month. In fact, she likely won't be home until next Fall, but that's a whole 'nother bag of beans.
It's actually been a bit of a feat to pull off for the last few years, and Jill has been wanting to throw in the towel on it for some time. She's graciously gone along with it and helped in every aspect, though, for which I am grateful. John's familial obligations have dwarfed his involvement in party prep for a few years now, but he's always come through (with coolers, driveway lighting, extra bins for trash & recycling, and usually way too much beer & alcohol) on the morning of the party.
Between the four of us, our guest list has swelled into the triple digits and at this point, the guests' ages span four generations.
I have looked forward to seeing familiar faces each year, and I am almost positive that I've met someone new every year, too. Last year we raised our glasses to toast the engagement of a couple who met at our Christmas party only a couple of years before.
We've popped bottles of champagne and had Beirut tournaments.
We've run out of food & ordered pizzas.
We've had fires in the fireplace and put floating candles in the pool.
We've served Skippy and Puppy Chow.
I've worn heels some years and slippers other years.
Each year we collected donations for Sacred Heart Services.
I guess I could go on and on. I just wanted to acknowledge the end of an era of sorts. It had to happen sometime, I suppose, and life will go on just fine. But, I'll miss it.
And we never got around to executing Joanne's idea of wearing really bad Christmas sweaters!
We will not be throwing our annual Saunders Christmas Party this year.
We've been co-hosting this event with the support and generous hospitality of our parents for 15 years. Well, this would have been the 15th year, anyway.
There are a handful of reasons why it doesn't make sense for us to have it anymore - one of them being the fact that Joanne will still be in New Zealand next month. In fact, she likely won't be home until next Fall, but that's a whole 'nother bag of beans.
It's actually been a bit of a feat to pull off for the last few years, and Jill has been wanting to throw in the towel on it for some time. She's graciously gone along with it and helped in every aspect, though, for which I am grateful. John's familial obligations have dwarfed his involvement in party prep for a few years now, but he's always come through (with coolers, driveway lighting, extra bins for trash & recycling, and usually way too much beer & alcohol) on the morning of the party.
Between the four of us, our guest list has swelled into the triple digits and at this point, the guests' ages span four generations.
I have looked forward to seeing familiar faces each year, and I am almost positive that I've met someone new every year, too. Last year we raised our glasses to toast the engagement of a couple who met at our Christmas party only a couple of years before.
We've popped bottles of champagne and had Beirut tournaments.
We've run out of food & ordered pizzas.
We've had fires in the fireplace and put floating candles in the pool.
We've served Skippy and Puppy Chow.
I've worn heels some years and slippers other years.
Each year we collected donations for Sacred Heart Services.
I guess I could go on and on. I just wanted to acknowledge the end of an era of sorts. It had to happen sometime, I suppose, and life will go on just fine. But, I'll miss it.
And we never got around to executing Joanne's idea of wearing really bad Christmas sweaters!
Thursday, November 12, 2009
where's my baby belly?
um....yeah. I'm over 5 months pregnant now and I still only have my little, mushy post Sadie belly that I lovingly refer to as my "buddha".
I'm one of those women who loved being pregnant and looked forward to doing it again. I was thrilled to continually hear the conventional wisdom that "you pop out immediately when you get pregnant a second time". I couldn't wait.
Well...
WHERE'S MY BELLY?!
I even went and bought one of those dippy shirts that says "expecting". I'm glad there weren't any "I'm not fat. I'm pregnant." ones (which I have always detested) because I can't be totally sure that wouldn't have bought one of those, too!
I know, I know - I'm saving lots of money on maternity clothes and I should enjoying this time and be glad that I'm not enormous and uncomfortable, blah blah.
But I want my baby belly! I want it. There, that's all.
Okay, I'm done whining.
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