Sunday, June 3, 2012

The Black and White Ball


 Thank you KDFC, for the free party passes to the San Francisco Symphony's Black and White Ball!  Happy 100 years to them and long live music education in public schools!



What a PARTY it was!

We were starving when we arrived but that was taken care of immediately, as there was copious amounts of food everywhere.  There were booths overflowing with prawns, chow mein, veggies, steak, sausages, pork, sushi, taquitos, dim sum dumplings, you name it.  There was never a wait for drinks, either.

There was a giant mirror ball spinning and lighting up City Hall, the War Memorial Veterans Building and Davies Symphony Hall.


The fashion was fantastic - people were seriously decked out and almost everyone was in black and white.

My favorites were the fabulous identically dressed drag queens
(terribly dark and blurry photos from my phone camera)


this dapper couple
 she made this hat, folks.  The cables of the bridge are beaded.  Unreal.

 There was a man in full kilt,



 there were top hats & gloves, furs & sequins, and an endless parade of impossibly chic cocktail dresses, quirky/fun dressy outfits, and truly remarkable, gorgeous gowns.





 I didn't get nearly enough photos, so I'm going to hunt for some online and try to share them.

The staff were all totally friendly, professional and fun.  These guys hammed it up (pun intended) for this shot:


This Peachy's Puffs gal (who must have been positively freezing!)


casually began explaining the Tragedy of the Commons to me by way of an apology/explanation for not having any more LED flashing jelly rings left.  She said people had begun grabbing fistfuls out of her tray.  Boo hoo.  Sadie and Lilah would have loved those.

Here was a lady I just had to get a photo of:

Check her out in her sparkly top, flashing jelly ring, perusing her smart phone!  Love it.
The mixed demographic of the crowd was one of my favorite aspects of the entire night.  Andrew commented later that he had forgotten what a people-watcher I am.  I seriously could have just wandered around all night telling people how fabulous they looked.  I love doing that.

Maybe I'll do it again someday...

I haven't even mentioned the entertainment.  Excellent!  We wandered around to try to get a sampling of each but didn't hear it all, I don't think.
Here was the line up:
The Wallflowers sounded great, the Bobby Rodriguez Latin Jazz band had people tearing it up,
Janelle Monae & her band were excellent;


 she covered Prince's "Take Me With You" and Charlie Chaplin's iconic "Smile" which was really lovely...

We had to leave before the "Midnight Surprise" (fireworks? confetti cannon?) while the one and only Cyndi Lauper was still performing in order to get home to our sweet 17 year old babysitter (on loan on crazy short notice from my friend Melissa) by 12:30 as promised.  Her father was picking her up - I was not about to be late!

Here are my parting shots.



 If someone had told me when I was 12 that I'd be at a ball in San Francisco near the stroke of midnight wearing a floor length strapless satin dress with my husband listening to her, I would have never believed it...

*sigh*

What a night.

Sunday, May 27, 2012

Moments like these...




I wonder if they'll remember driving with the windows down on a sunny Spring day with Bob Marley on the radio and the wind in their hair.

I will.


Thursday, May 10, 2012

April was a bit insane. Hello, May.

April was an epic month for us - I think it was the busiest/fullest we've ever had.
Here's a run down with mostly pictures, because if I try to write it all out in lovely narrative form, I'd be lucky to get it posted by June!

April 3-10 my second cousin Ana was here from Mexico with her husband and daughter who is exactly Lilah's age.  I busted out as much Spanish as I could and we took turns correcting one another.  I'm so lucky to have these relatives!



April 4th - my big brother's 40th!  We convinced him not to scrap the celebration they had planned at their place and had a nice little party at my folks' house instead.  I was proud of myself for finding a nice Zinfandel for him from a winery in Napa whose vineyards were planted the year of his birth - 1972. It supposedly will age beautifully for 10 years and goes well with pizza.  Score!

April 9th my baby turned 2!  We had a little party at Vasona with a train ride and a spin on the carousel.  She had an absolute ball. 
 

April 11th - Andrew's childhood friend Max was on vacation from Switzerland with his family (they did a house swap for a place in Santa Cruz) so we drove over and spent the day with them.  I absolutely love seeing my man hanging with an old buddy.




April 15th - Sunday Night Dinner Birthday Edition at my parents' house for Andrew and me.  My mom prepared a mini Mexican feast with all sorts of deliciousness.
 
 
 
 Another one of Andrew's childhood friends, Peter Sokolowski was in attendance, as he was out here on his every-other-year trip for a conference in Oakland.  He also gave a lecture at Stanford.  He's a lexicographer and Editor-at-Large for Merriam-Webster.  Smarty pants.  ;) 

April 16th - Andrew's (actual) birthday.
The early morning performance at SCU for the 5th anniversary of the Virginia Tech Massacre.  There is short slide show of photos and a few words about it here: http://chronicle.com/article/Remembering-a-Tragedy/131573/

later that night: Out to dinner with the girls.
 

April 18th - J9 heads to NYC - Happy Birthday to me trip.
This trip deserves it's own post entirely, but I may never get around to doing that, so I'm squishing it in here.  I tucked my babes into bed and got a ride from a friend to the airport for a redeye flight to JFK.  I took a cab to my friend's amazing apartment in the East Village (she has a backyard, y'all!) and we cruised around her 'hood for a few hours. 
 

 Then we headed to Broadway and I proceeded to have my mind completely blown by the most amazing performance I have ever seen in my life.  "Venus in Fur" at the Lyceum Theatre.



Even though all of the articles and reviews I had read had prepared me to be impressed (seriously, the reviewers fall all over themselves to describe Nina Arianda's superb acting) I was still practically dumbfounded by the raw power of her performance from her madcap but endearing entrance to the lighting & thunder blackout.  I literally leaped to my feet to join my fellow theatre goers to give her and Hugh Dancy a standing ovation.  Here I am geeking out at the stage door after the show:


What a way to spend my first night back in New York after living there for a meager 18 months twelve years ago.  The next 2 and a half days flew by.  Friday we walked all over, window shopping and eating.  We were able to  include a delightful stroll along the Highline (so cool) until a goofy six-foot-something French teenager stepped on the back of Holly's sandal and took the sole right off!  We (I) had a good laugh about that.

A crazy stroke of fate landed us tickets to the entirely SOLD OUT Book of Mormon's Saturday matinee,

and I had dinner at my friends Xander & Natasha's place on the Upper West Side.  My rainy Sunday included a walk to a diner for breakfast (where, I have to add - we saw a most spectacular young woman doing her walk of shame* - I mean, seriously, I have never seen someone rock a red miniskirt/dress & flawless black stilettos like that - but I was like: hey, sister - I think this when you spring for a cab even if you can't afford it and before I knew it, I was on a plane home with a bag of bagels in my carry-on.
*yes, I take issue with this phrase

Andrew let the girls stay up past their bedtime to come get me at the airport and I got a running-leap-into-my-arms hug from Sadie.  Lilah had fallen asleep on the way, but we had a nice reunion in the morning.  I missed these little buggers.


And last but not least *drum roll, please...*

On, April 28th I packed my two darling girls, a handful of books, plenty of snacks, electronic toys and Music Together CDs in the car and drove over 2 hours (each way) to the Unitewomen.org rally and march in Sacramento.

! ! ! !

Yes, I did.


I'll let the photos speak for themselves:
 
 
 
 








So, that was our April!

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Happy Spring! God! NYC! and Women, Unite!

Vernal Equinox 2012.

I'm looking to turn over a new leaf, begin a new chapter, embrace my potential.

I'm not exactly sure how that is going to manifest but there has been a stirring inside me that has been building for some time and I feel it's time to release it.  Actually, it feels like it's going to happen no matter what.  It's not in my hands, so to speak - it feels bigger than I am.



This moment in time absolutely fits what I think I've been feeling.  I feel a sense of my physical and metaphysical selves wanting to come into harmony.  I am keenly aware of the duality of my humanness and my spirit trying to meet one another and go forward in unison, aiming for balance.  

I need to move.  I need to open.  I need to engage.  I feel a call to action.  All of these things are being answered by what's going on my life right now, so all I have to do is trust and follow this energy that is guiding me.

I'm involved with and currently rehearsing an intense and profound performance piece to be done at Santa Clara University the morning of April 16th, called What A Stranger May Know.

It is to commemorate the 5th anniversary of the massacre at Virginia Tech.  It is almost impossible to describe, but each of the victims will be represented in poetic, liturgical texts that serve to honor their lives lost.  It is presented on the University's website like this:
A play commemorating the lives of the thirty-two victims of Virginia Tech.
By Erik Ehn
April 16, 2012 7:30 am
St. Ignatius LawnSanta Clara University is one of 24 universities presenting Erik Ehn’s ambitious “What a Stranger May Know” on that day. Erik Ehn, Director of Playwriting at Brown University and internationally recognized artist-activist, has written 32 plays, one for each of the victims of the shootings at Virginia Tech and these will be performed as readings on the five-year anniversary of that day, April 16, 2012 across the United States.
Ehn is endeavouring to "write the unspeakable" and to make reflective, not informational works in which no one is impersonated.  He describes the simultaneous readings of these 32 scripts as "people thinking in time...a memorial action."  The goal being "to provide a community with imaginative access to mourning." Since the shootings took place in a hall where French, German and Hydrology were taught, there are many references to these three subjects in the monologues about both students and professors who lost their lives that day.
It's a hugely collaborative process and I'm so fortunate to be connected to this group of people.  The rehearsal has been inspiring yet arduous.  The words are dense and meaningful, the emotion is high.  I am moved to tears almost every time I enter the script.
An excerpt from the most recent email from my friend and director, playwright Eric Loo:
"this project is not just about what we experience or learn by doing this project.  It's about our spiritual carbon footprint that we're leaving, not only on the St. Ignatius lawn, but at the University and in the Universe."

Amen.

This weekend I'm planning to attend my first service at a place of worship in a very long time.  I used to go to midnight mass when I was at SCU but to say that I've become a lay Catholic is an understatement.  I recently decided that I wanted to find a way to tap into my spirituality and the very next day my online email group of Holistic Moms had a thread about finding a place of worship.  The request was worded basically exactly how I would have asked:
"Hi Moms, I was wondering if any of you attend a church/spiritual group/meditation group that you really like and recommend? I'm open to attending most any church/religion -- because I've found that the people are what really make the difference."
The responses and recommendations were great, and I've picked one to try out.  Looking forward to it.

I've got a birthday-present-to-myself trip planned for the middle of April; I'm off to New York City for the first time since I lived there in 1999 and 2000.  Solo.  Should be a wonderful, whirlwind 3 days and 3 nights.  Staying with Holly and seeing Dan Korb and visiting with Xander & his crew.  (that will only mean something to you if you know me and/or them)
I'm *so* excited to hang in that magnificent city and I'm trying to get a loose outline of my itinerary sketched out because I know it will be such a short trip that I don't want to try to do too much.  I also don't want to be kicking myself on the flight home for not doing/going/seeing something or somewhere.  (Suggestions welcome!)  I'm sure it's going to be bittersweet leaving Andrew & the girls, but mama needs a break!

Finally, I have a new experience looming on my horizon.  The weekend after I get back from NYC, I'm doing my first ever organized political march.  My days of being "anti-political anything" are over.  I'm finally motivated enough by the utter nonsense going on with regard to women's health, contraception, and other women's issues, that I've decided to go to Sacramento to participate in the We Are Women march on April 28th.



There's quite a bit of back-story that led me to this decision, but let's just say it's been building.  I have some kick-ass feminist friends who have illuminated this topic for me recently, so I've been doing lots of late night reading online about it.  If you're interested, there are some great articles that I can point to.  Some of the bills that are passing or barely being voted down are absolutely mind boggling.  Forced trans-vaginal ultrasounds?!  Are.  You.  Kidding.  Me?!
I do realize that the reason for the recent resurgence of rhetoric surrounding all of this might be the simple fact that it's an election year, but it doesn't matter.  These "issues" were handled half a century ago.  We will not be dragged back in time when it comes to equality and dignity.  We will not have our reproductive rights even questioned, let alone revoked.  More on this later.

This post has gotten way longer than I intended.  Are you really still here?

Peace.

J9



Friday, March 9, 2012

Today

It's feels hopeless to try to catch up on what our lives have been like lately, so

I give you

a little bit of
what we did

today








Thursday, January 26, 2012

how cool is THIS?

You may not have any interest in a college bowl game from 75 years ago but I do! 



What's this? Oh, that's right - it's footage of 
my GRANDFATHER 
from the SCU vs. LSU Sugar Bowl of 1937. 
"Santa Clara took the lead on a 27-yard pass play from Falaschi to MANNY GOMEZ" 

click and watch this 2 minute video. 

 
So awesome.

and a couple of photos:
my grandpa is on the bottom right with his face parallel to the camera

 and here he is again on the bottom left - dark and handsome (he was Mexican)

Here's the article by Chuck Hildebrand:

On New Year’s Day 1937, a team from a little Jesuit school in the Santa Clara Valley stunned the sports world with an upset that won them the Sugar Bowl. And put their home on the map.
The 47 Santa Clara football players and their entourage weren’t sure what was in store at the other end of the line when their Southern Pacific Bronco Special pulled out of the Santa Clara train station the day after Christmas 1936. But they knew who they were and whence they had come: through a season that, by the end of November, was 7-0 and had them ranked fifth in the Associated Press college football poll, introduced that fall. They beat Stanford, Auburn, and rival St. Mary’s. And on Dec. 4, they accepted a bid to play No. 2-ranked Louisiana State University in the Sugar Bowl at New Orleans’ Tulane Stadium.
"There was no question we thought we could win the game ...
We were good, and we knew it."
It was virtually a home game for the Tigers; oddsmakers favored LSU 4-to-1. The LSU program had been a public plaything of Louisiana Gov. Huey Long before his assassination in 1935: He’d hired and fired coaches, involved himself in recruiting—even tried to dictate play calls. He devoted enormous state resources to strengthening the university. One result: The LSU line averaged 212 pounds—25 pounds more than Santa Clara’s.
The Broncos were virtually unknown in the football-loving East, Midwest, and South. An AP preview story on the eve of the Sugar Bowl included multiple references to the “Bronchos.” Most Santa Clara players came from first- or second-generation immigrant Bay Area families and regarded their football experiences as extensions of their working-class backgrounds. In the midst of the Depression, few of them could have considered college had it not been for their football skills. They played as if far more than the outcome of a game was at stake.
They also had Coach Buck Shaw. He drilled his men in “moving your feet, keeping your balance, things like that,” said center Phil Dougherty ’37.
They were smaller but faster.
“There was no question we thought we could win the game,” teammate Jesse Coffer ’37 said. “We were good, and we knew it.”

Game on

The teams took the already muddy field in a steady drizzle before a capacity crowd of 42,000 at Tulane Stadium. One surprise for the Broncos: While Huey Long and LSU football were deified in rural Louisiana, the Crescent City was still a Tulane town, and a large segment of the throng was there to jeer LSU and cheer for its opposition. Fans of sister Jesuit school Loyola University of New Orleans were on Santa Clara’s side, too.
At a time before unlimited substitution was allowed, Shaw predicated playing time mainly on defensive skills at three of the four backfield positions. But he had one generalist, Nello Falaschi ’37, who never left the field, and was both the face and the personality of the 1936 Broncos.
Falaschi returned the opening kickoff to the Bronco 41. Teams exchanged punts. A few minutes later, fullback Chuck Pavelko ’37 took a snap from center, feinted left, shook an LSU tackle, and ran 13 yards to the LSU 31. Two plays later, with the ball still on the 31, Pavelko took a snap, pretended to burrow into the line, raised up and flipped a lateral to Falaschi, who then hit wide-open halfback Manny Gomez ’37 with a touchdown pass that gave Santa Clara a 7-0 lead.
Relive the game: Watch the Broncos in the
1937 Sugar Bowl.
 
Meet the team: See historic photographs.
Not much later, back in possession on the LSU 30, Santa Clara went for broke on fourth-and-12: Bruno Pellegrini ’37 connected with end Norm Finney ’37, who was alone in the end zone. The Broncos were up 14-0. The crowd went wild. LSU landed one touchdown pass just before halftime to narrow LSU’s deficit to 14-7. With his team up, Shaw was concerned about his players being slowed by uniforms and boots now caked in mud. So he put in a call to Loyola.
“When we got to the dressing room,” Al Wolff ’38 recalled, “there were dozens of shoes sent over by Loyola, just scattered around the floor. The coaches said, ‘Find a pair that fits and put ’em on. Then we changed into our practice uniforms for the second half, and we were ready to play again.”
The defense took over in the second half. LSU managed only 44 rushing yards in the game, and went 25 game minutes without registering a first down during one stretch. A 35-yard interception return by Gomez gave Santa Clara the ball at the LSU 15 midway through the third quarter, and on first and goal from the 4, end Frank “Mississippi” Smith ’37 took a handoff on an end-around and scored to give Santa Clara a 21-7 lead. LSU scored on the second play of the fourth quarter but never seriously threatened to score again. The final score was 21-14.
The ride home was a festive one indeed—so much so that, celebrating along the way, a few of the players even spent a night in jail in Juárez.*
Seventy-five years later, there are only a few of the ’37 Sugar Bowl Broncos left. Chuck Pavelko, now 96, lives in Del Mar. Al Wolff, now 94, lives in Santa Barbara. Wolff sums up that era so: “Football put Santa Clara University on the map.”



Friday, January 20, 2012

Opening night! and "Don't Carpe Diem"

Yay, I'm back on the boards!
I have 2 short scenes in a production of Marvin's Room and I'm really excited to play for a sold out audience tonight.  The theater is small but it's the perfect space for this intimate, deep and lovely show about life, family, love and death.  Plus, my two characters seem to be written for comic relief, which suits me perfectly right now.
It's been a pretty light rehearsal process for me, which was key for me to be able to do it at all.  It's taken me out of the dinner-bath-books-bedtime routine a few nights a week for the past month, which has been a welcome break.  Andrew does just fine with the girls and I know it's good for us to share responsibilities and support one another's extra-curricular activities.  It's vital, actually.
Plus, the girls know that I'm at rehearsal, doing what I love.  That's huge, because I would like to get acting back into my bones consistently and forever, and this allows my daughters to start learning more about their mom as a person. (what a concept!) Sadie is excited to come visit the theater, even though she can't see the performance. 

In other news, this article was shared with me on Facebook and I could not possibly agree with it more.  It hits the nail on the head so completely, it's staggering.  I love it.  It's long, so I highlighted my favorite parts.

Glennon Melton
blogger, Momastery
Every time I'm out with my kids -- this seems to happen:
An older woman stops us, puts her hand over her heart and says something like, "Oh, Enjoy every moment. This time goes by so fast."
Everywhere I go, someone is telling me to seize the moment, raise my awareness, be happy, enjoy every second, etc, etc, etc.
I know that this message is right and good. But, I have finally allowed myself to admit that it just doesn't work for me. It bugs me. This CARPE DIEM message makes me paranoid and panicky. Especially during this phase of my life - while I'm raising young kids. Being told, in a million different ways to CARPE DIEM makes me worry that if I'm not in a constant state of intense gratitude and ecstasy, I'm doing something wrong.

I think parenting young children (and old ones, I've heard) is a little like climbing Mount Everest. Brave, adventurous souls try it because they've heard there's magic in the climb. They try because they believe that finishing, or even attempting the climb are impressive accomplishments. They try because during the climb, if they allow themselves to pause and lift their eyes and minds from the pain and drudgery, the views are breathtaking. They try because even though it hurts and it's hard, there are moments that make it worth the hard. These moments are so intense and unique that many people who reach the top start planning, almost immediately, to climb again. Even though any climber will tell you that most of the climb is treacherous, exhausting, killer. That they literally cried most of the way up.
And so I think that if there were people stationed, say, every thirty feet along Mount Everest yelling to the climbers -- "ARE YOU ENJOYING YOURSELF!? IF NOT, YOU SHOULD BE! ONE DAY YOU'LL BE SORRY YOU DIDN'T!" TRUST US!! IT'LL BE OVER TOO SOON! CARPE DIEM!" -- those well-meaning, nostalgic cheerleaders might be physically thrown from the mountain.
Now. I'm not suggesting that the sweet old ladies who tell me to ENJOY MYSELF be thrown from a mountain. These are wonderful ladies. Monkees, probably. But last week, a woman approached me in the Target line and said the following: "Sugar, I hope you are enjoying this. I loved every single second of parenting my two girls. Every single moment. These days go by so fast."

At that particular moment, Amma had arranged one of the new bras I was buying on top of her sweater and was sucking a lollipop that she must have found on the ground. She also had three shop-lifted clip-on neon feathers stuck in her hair. She looked exactly like a contestant from Toddlers and Tiaras. I couldn't find Chase anywhere, and Tish was grabbing the pen on the credit card swiper thing WHILE the woman in front of me was trying to use it. And so I just looked at the woman, smiled and said, "Thank you. Yes. Me too. I am enjoying every single moment. Especially this one. Yes. Thank you."

That's not exactly what I wanted to say, though.
There was a famous writer who, when asked if he loved writing, replied, "No. but I love having written." What I wanted to say to this sweet woman was, "Are you sure? Are you sure you don't mean you love having parented?"
I love having written. And I love having parented. My favorite part of each day is when the kids are put to sleep (to bed) and Craig and I sink into the couch to watch some quality TV, like Celebrity Wife Swap, and congratulate each other on a job well done. Or a job done, at least.
Every time I write a post like this, I get emails suggesting that I'm being negative. I have received this particular message four or five times -- G, if you can't handle the three you have, why do you want a fourth?

That one always stings, and I don't think it's quite fair. Parenting is hard. Just like lots of important jobs are hard. Why is it that the second a mother admits that it's hard, people feel the need to suggest that maybe she's not doing it right? Or that she certainly shouldn't add more to her load. Maybe the fact that it's so hard means she IS doing it right...in her own way...and she happens to be honest.

Craig is a software salesman. It's a hard job in this economy. And he comes home each day and talks a little bit about how hard it is. And I don't ever feel the need to suggest that he's not doing it right, or that he's negative for noticing that it's hard, or that maybe he shouldn't even consider taking on more responsibility. And I doubt anybody comes by his office to make sure he's ENJOYING HIMSELF. I doubt his boss peeks in his office and says: "This career stuff...it goes by so fast...ARE YOU ENJOYING EVERY MOMENT IN THERE, CRAIG???? CARPE DIEM, CRAIG!"

My point is this. I used to worry that not only was I failing to do a good enough job at parenting, but that I wasn't enjoying it enough. Double failure. I felt guilty because I wasn't in parental ecstasy every hour of every day and I wasn't MAKING THE MOST OF EVERY MOMENT like the mamas in the parenting magazines seemed to be doing. I felt guilty because honestly, I was tired and cranky and ready for the day to be over quite often. And because I knew that one day, I'd wake up and the kids would be gone, and I'd be the old lady in the grocery store with my hand over my heart. Would I be able to say I enjoyed every moment? No.

But the fact remains that I will be that nostalgic lady. I just hope to be one with a clear memory. And here's what I hope to say to the younger mama gritting her teeth in line:
"It's helluva hard, isn't it? You're a good mom, I can tell. And I like your kids, especially that one peeing in the corner. She's my favorite. Carry on, warrior. Six hours till bedtime." And hopefully, every once in a while, I'll add -- "Let me pick up that grocery bill for ya, sister. Go put those kids in the van and pull on up -- I'll have them bring your groceries out."

Anyway. Clearly, Carpe Diem doesn't work for me. I can't even carpe fifteen minutes in a row, so a whole diem is out of the question.


Here's what does work for me:

There are two different types of time. Chronos time is what we live in. It's regular time, it's one minute at a time, it's staring down the clock till bedtime time, it's ten excruciating minutes in the Target line time, it's four screaming minutes in time out time, it's two hours till daddy gets home time. Chronos is the hard, slow passing time we parents often live in.

Then there's Kairos time. Kairos is God's time. It's time outside of time. It's metaphysical time. It's those magical moments in which time stands still. I have a few of those moments each day. And I cherish them.
Like when I actually stop what I'm doing and really look at Tish. I notice how perfectly smooth and brownish her skin is. I notice the perfect curves of her teeny elf mouth and her asianish brown eyes, and I breathe in her soft Tishy smell. In these moments, I see that her mouth is moving but I can't hear her because all I can think is -- This is the first time I've really seen Tish all day, and my God -- she is so beautiful. Kairos.
Like when I'm stuck in chronos time in the grocery line and I'm haggard and annoyed and angry at the slow check-out clerk. And then I look at my cart and I'm transported out of chronos. And suddenly I notice the piles and piles of healthy food I'll feed my children to grow their bodies and minds and I remember that most of the world's mamas would kill for this opportunity. This chance to stand in a grocery line with enough money to pay. And I just stare at my cart. At the abundance. The bounty. Thank you, God. Kairos.
Or when I curl up in my cozy bed with Theo asleep at my feet and Craig asleep by my side and I listen to them both breathing. And for a moment, I think- how did a girl like me get so lucky? To go to bed each night surrounded by this breath, this love, this peace, this warmth? Kairos.
These kairos moments leave as fast as they come- but I mark them. I say the word kairos in my head each time I leave chronos. And at the end of the day, I don't remember exactly what my kairos moments were, but I remember I had them. And that makes the pain of the daily parenting climb worth it.
If I had a couple Kairos moments during the day, I call it a success.

Carpe a couple of Kairoses a day.
Good enough for me.